I finished reading my first physical book in 10 years. Recently I've been trying to read every night before bed, hoping that this will keep me from looking at my phone or other screens in bed, or even an hour before the lights go out. This has been an incredible two-week experiment. I fall asleep faster, I wake up feeling less lazy, and I actually enjoy reading. This is funny because I NEVER thought I would be a reader.

Man jogging while reading a book.

I'm Diverging From My Set Path

Do you know how you can decide things prematurely about yourself? I try not to do this anymore, but it still creeps in from time to time. A few big things I had decided about myself when I was 17-18 years old was that I'd never learn a programming language, you'd never see me waking up early (like, 4-5am), and I'd never be into reading physical books. The reasons for the programming and early-rising ones were because they seemed too hard and not worth it. The reason for the physical books was the existence of audiobooks.

I'm discovering this year that it's a pretty dumb idea to try and figure everything out about my path forward in life. There's just no way. And I shouldn't make finite decisions about who I am and who I will always be. I definitely shouldn't believe things about myself that limit me. I began to think, it's great to pursue figuring myself out, but I should be open to the idea of it being an ongoing process. There's no reason for limiting myself forever. Some things might not be a right fit for me today, but tomorrow that could very well change.

I've been learning about programming again, I can tell that I've changed a bit in the last 5-6 years because HTML and CSS actually seem exciting to me in a number of ways right now. Also, I've probably woken up between 4-5am only a handful of times in 2021, but that's more than I've ever done previously in my life, and I've loved it. One of these days I might begin getting up at sunrise as a regular routine.

Another thing I was against was the idea of running or jogging. I'm coming around to that idea now, too. I think one reason for being against it was because so many other people had taken ownership of that form of exercise for themselves, and I saw it as something THEY did. They were a runner, but myself? No, I'm not a runner. I don't run. And I never was able to take ownership of it for myself. I just wasn't that guy.

Do you see how many stupid things have held me back through the years? I'm happy that there is a possibility for people to change because I used to give in to so many irrational things. This year I can feel myself breaking out of each of them one by one.

And there are many more. It's a damn good thing I'm still young.

So, try asking yourself the question: "what premature decisions have I made about my future that I might want to take a look at?"

See you tomorrow.